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  • What do I do?

    My husband doesn't give two shakes about his new dialysis treatment, diet nor living for that matter. He has given up and is very depressed. He doesn't think he is depressed though!. For me watching this, it is frustrating, sad and scary all at the same time. What do I do?
    Last edited by MASTULZ; 09-04-2015, 07:04 PM.

  • #2
    Talk to his doctor. They may be able to do something about his depression. He will start to feel better after being on dialysis for a while from what I read. Keep trying to get him to follow his diet. You can't make him do what he should but try to be their for support and steer him in the right direction. Hopefully he will come around.

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    • #3
      thank you scaredycat!

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      • #4
        Nothing you can do. My husband doesn't have it but he has other problems - only doctors can help but he is the same way as yours. We are not professioanl people. Diet is very important, so just make good food choices for him and vitamins. At least that is what I am doing. I am Pookie12 and I did write today about what all I am suppose to eat and do. Also be there for him to support him and tell him you do not want to be left alone.
        Last edited by Pookie12; 09-07-2015, 04:22 PM.

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        • #5
          I am the same and it affects my wife I am getting ready to start dialysis and scared to have to live off a machine the rest of my life see I am the same as your husband it is hard to be week and have to admit you need help I'm only 45 but have to except all this its not easy my wife knows I'm trying but so frustrated and want to give in and up every day.

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          • #6
            I can never give up, life's too precious. I have to be strong for myself, my wife, daughters, son-in-laws and four grand children. I know it's frustrating dealing with all the problems and emotions. There's quite a lot of people out there dealing with the same situation so I am not alone. I depend on faith and prayers.

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            • #7
              Originally posted by usafmsgt View Post
              I can never give up, life's too precious. I have to be strong for myself, my wife, daughters, son-in-laws and four grand children. I know it's frustrating dealing with all the problems and emotions. There's quite a lot of people out there dealing with the same situation so I am not alone. I depend on faith and prayers.
              I like your attitude usafmsgt. That's the way to approach life.

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              • #8
                Depression is always looming. It comes and it goes. The worst is when you try to do something you used to do no sweat and you just can't. The other side is when others (spouse) forgets and just keeps going and going and going - happened at Disneyland last year. The way I overcome it is to plan specific activities and then celebrate when I get them done. It was difficult for me, but for example when I do yardwork around the house, I go for 15-20 minutes full blast and then I go sit down for 10. It may take all day, but I get substantial work done and feel better about it. You learn not to care so much about the little things...

                The other side is that I plan for "full days" by scheduling myself for the following day where I literally do nothing...sleep in, kick it watching tv and most important, I let myself not feel guilty about taking it easy. Other than looking like I have a beer belly from the pd, rarely does anyone even guess I am disabled. Yes, dialysis will definitely spank you if you push it too far, but my fears that I held when I was a new patient were crippling. I learned over time that medically, it was 95% anxiety in my mind that caused me problems, not ACTUAL problems.

                The way I get by is to not let my disability define me. I look at it this way, white water rafting was fun but now I'm getting old so maybe it would not be as fun anyways. Keep moving on...

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