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Pleas help, last night was horrible!

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  • Pleas help, last night was horrible!

    Im currently 19 and in an awesome relationship with my girlfriend who is 27 who has currently started home hemo dialysis *we have been together for 2 years*. The first day are two was great and I was very excited to take a new journey with her.But It didnt last long.Last night she told me she wanted to go back to the clinic to do dialysis and everything with south from there.she expressed how she didnt like sticking herself and me sticking her is not an option at the time because she not confident in me because I am not confident in myself (which is true).I have attempted to stick her once on my own and it was an epic fail.I have a big fear of hurting her.how do I get over my nerves? STICKING HERSELF IS NOT THE ONLY PROBLEM BUT ITS THE BIGGEST PROBLEM. When we first stared traning it didnt hurt to stick her but at home her button hole has been giving her problem.it hurts everytime she sticks herself.I need someone to give me advice on what to do.i dont feel like i have to do this but i want to.i love beging there for her but she never lets me.going back to the clinic to do dialysis is a mager set back and I dont want here to go.but on the other hand im TIRED of trying to be there and I dont know how.i cant talk to her about this because shes also depressed about all of this and I dont want to make it worst, but I need someone to talk to.i feel like she has me to talk to but I have no one whos in my shoes and under stands.

    P.S. we haven't even been doing home hemo for a month

  • #2
    Hello tiarrachatters,

    My care partner/spouse (of 36 year) and I have been performing HHD since completing training in September 2012. I always planned on self cannulating with buttonhole access in my lower arm fistula and after set backs with infiltrations and a subsequent fistullogram, I was on my way to buttonhole development and going home to conduct the HHD 5X weekly treatments while maintaining a demanding full time job, which included short notice multi-night travel. I've learned a great deal about my fistula through my treatments and self-cannulation, enough to develop my own button hole access and even "tune them up" occassionally when the needle angle has changed indicating that the alignment of tract in the tissue and the fistula flap has changed. I encourage you to read my posts to get a better grasp of the possibilites and the actions you and your girlfriend can take to get back to HHD and the freedom that it affords.

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    • #3
      Has she looked into PD instead? I feel much better and use a cycler overnite while I sleep. I stayed on HD while I trained on PD and made sure it would work for me....

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